I recently had a good talk with my old friend Jay-Z, during which I thanked him for the millionth time for keeping Beyonce away from a studio for as long as he could. Beyonce, be it looks or music, is what would happen if Scary Spice and Brooke Hogan had sex. And because Brooke has a penis, that's not too hard to imagine.
I digress. Mr. -Z informed me that he has taken a stand against the Auto-Tune movement in R&B and Rap, decrying it's death. What is Auto-Tune you ask? Well imagine if Johnny-5, for a high school project, spent a year in a studio recording himself telling us how awesome he is, how much money he spends, and threatening to "put it on you." Now imagine Kanye copied Johnny's idea and turned it in before #5 could, sullying the fine name of that lovable robot. Kanye sucks like that.
So there you have it. Jay-Z is sick and tired of it, and wrote the song "DOA" to explain his feelings. He basically tells us, "I never want to hear another monotone voice and repetitive substance over and over."
He then goes on to remind how us how great he is, how many cars he owns, how much money he spent on his necklace and what it's like to bang that pop clone.
Silly Rappers.
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